Winter Tree

I did my first painting tonight. A few friends have mentioned doing birth art and/or art therapy, and the idea sounded very interesting to me, as I've had a lot on my mind and heart lately. So, I got a pad of paper and some watercolors and finally sat down to do my first painting. Here is the result:

The colors are a little washed out, as this is a photograph of the painting. But I think I like the look of it with the lighter blue background.
I'd had this image stuck in my head for a few days of a silhouetted tree against a blue background. So, that's what I painted. I just thought I was painting a tree. But my subconscious sort of took over.

I just recently experienced a miscarriage. It's been a pretty difficult month since then, and I've known that I had feelings buried about it, as well as about my previous losses.

I showed my husband the picture, and he told me how the uprooted tree represents our miscarried child, and my friend added that the snowflakes represent the coldness and pain that I'm feeling. And then I realized, also, that the rounded shape of the blue background is very womb-like. It's amazing what our subconscious can do if we let it. And it is also amazing how healing the process of creating simple picture of three colors can be.

So, this is my watercolor painting, which I've titled "Winter Tree." And it is in honor of our lost child, whom we have decided to call Rowan.

**In memory of Rowan Lutes, November 9, 2010**